THE RACCOONS FAN FICTION
BLUE SKUNK BLUES
Written by Rkerekes13, Jennifer Elliot, and Jacob Turner
The Raccoons (C) Skywriter Media and Entertainment Group
Eustace Skunk (C) Rkerekes13
Lindsay Bellefleur (C) Jennifer Elliot
Charlie (C) Jennifer Elliot
Senor Cougar De La Puma (C) Rkerekes13
Michelle Raccoon (C) SkiffyKitten
NOTE: Elements of this story are based off the Wishbone episode "The Hunchdog of Notre Dame", the Shining Time Station episode "Schemer's Special Club", and the Family Matters episode "Fight The Good Fight". Also, I got the title of this story from the depressing Tom & Jerry cartoon "Blue Cat Blues".
All the students were taking their seats, Bonneville and Lindsay both sitting up at the front, as Miss Primrose walked in.
MISS PRIMROSE: Good morning, class. We have a special guest today. I know most of you have met him before, but for those of you who haven't, let me introduce to you Mr. Perkins.
Mr. Perkins walked in wearing a gray suit.
BONNEVILLE: Oh no, not him!
LINDSAY: What's the matter with him?
BONNEVILLE: If you have to ask, Lindsay, well... you'll see for yourself.
MR. PERKINS: Good morning, students.
STUDENTS: Good morning, Mr. Perkins.
MR. PERKINS: I am very pleased to be here again, and I see we have some brand new faces. Please tell me your names.
Mr. Perkins spat on Lindsay as he spoke.
LINDSAY: Eww! (to Bonneville) I can see why you dislike him, Bonneville.
BONNEVILLE: I once called him Sir Spits-A-Lot.
LINDSAY: And I can't say that I blame you.
MISS PRIMROSE: (to Bonneville and Lindsay) Pay attention, you two!
BONNEVILLE AND LINDSAY: (in unison) Sorry, Miss Primrose!
MR. PERKINS: (to Lindsay) And what's your name, young lady?
LINDSAY: Oh, I'm Lindsay, and I'm from Florida which is down in America.
MR. PERKINS: Really? That's very interesting.
LINDSAY: (wiping spit off herself) Thank you, Sir Spits-A... er, I mean, Mr. Perkins.
MR. PERKINS: You're welcome.
Mr. Perkins walked up to Eustace who was sitting behind Bentley and Penny.
MR. PERKINS: (to Eustace) And what's your name, young man?
EUSTACE: (shyly) I'm Eustace, and I have Aspergers syndrome.
BENTLEY: He's also very sensitive and jumpy, Mr. Perkins.
PENNY: Yeah, so you'd better not startle him, or... well, I think you already know.
MR. PERKINS: I understand perfectly. (to Eustace) And I can see what certainly makes you different from the other students.
EUSTACE: (wiping spit off himself) Really?
MR. PERKINS: Really really. (walking back up to the front of the room) As a matter of fact, I came today to talk about one of my favorite stories which deals with people who are different: "The Hunchback Of Notre Dame".
LINDSAY: Hey, I've seen the Disney version of that story!
MR. PERKINS: Well, then, Lindsay, you must know what a great, powerful story it is about a man named Quasimodo who works as the bell ringer of the Notre Dame cathedral. (to all the class) He is greatly despised by the people of Paris because of his hunched back and his very ugly face. After he gets in trouble, he is soon helped by a beautiful gypsy named Esmeralda who is later let into the cathedral to stay with him.
As Mr. Perkins spoke, Lindsay shielded her face with her arms, trying to avoid Mr. Perkins' spit. Eustace, on the other hand, listened in amazement.
Inside, Cedric and Sophia were playing with their son Xavier in the study.
SOPHIA: (playfully hiding her face and then peeking) Peekaboo!
Xavier giggled. Cedric chuckled and reached inside a cookie jar he was holding to get a cookie which he handed to Sophia.
SOPHIA: (to Xavier) Here, you want a cookie? Yes, you want a cookie!
Xavier giggled and reached for the cookie. Sophia broke it in half and fed half of it to Xavier.
SOPHIA: You like that, don't you? Yes, you do! Yes, you do!
Sophia fed Xavier the other half of the cookie and then fed him his milk inside his bottle.
SOPHIA: (giggling) He's almost getting big!
CEDRIC: Yeah, I can see that!
Just then, Cyril Sneer came in followed by the Pigs, all of them looking as refined as can be. Cyril was holding a tray of food under a silver cover dome, and Boyd was carrying a bottle of Mexican wine.
CYRIL: Good morning, my good son and daughter-in-law and grandchild.
CEDRIC: Wow, Pop, you look great! What are you up to?
CYRIL: Cedric, my boy, I have big day ahead of me. Has Senor Cougar De La Puma called for me?
CEDRIC: Senor Cougar De La Puma? Who's that?
CYRIL: I'm very glad you asked that. Senor Cougar De La Puma, one of Mexico's wealthiest cats, happens to be the president of the Elite Internacional De Los Más Ricos Del Mundo.
SOPHIA: (confused) What's that?
CYRIL: It's the International Elite Of The World's Wealthiest. Anyway, I've invited him to check out the place, and if I can impress him, he's gonna let me join.
LLOYD: Yeah, and we're gonna join, too.
FLOYD: Which reminds us, the boss has arranged for your friends to come here as well...
BOYD: ...so that you and they can impress Senor De La Puma and get in the elite as well.
CYRIL: So you'd better get yourself cleaned up, my boy, or we blow this huge opportunity.
CEDRIC: I'll get on it right away, Pop. By the way, what's under there?
CYRIL: (lifting the tray to reveal a platter of delicious Mexican foods) Oh, these are just a few modest treats for Senor De Le Puma's elegant snacking enjoyment.
SOPHIA: That looks delicious!
CYRIL: Why, thank you. This is some salsa that I made myself. It's my own secret recipe. And here are the chips and some golden brown chicken and cheese quesadillas and my personal favorite: authentic Mexican wine. Now, afterwards, if there's anything left, maybe you all can share some of this with me. I always like to dip deep in my salsa, and I'm sure Senor De La Puma does, too.
CEDRIC: How do you know that, Pop?
CYRIL: 'Cause Senor De La Puma and I are the same kinda people, of course. Now if you'll excuse us, we have to practice. (pretending to act refined) Ah, Senor y Senora De La Puma. Welcome to my hacienda.
FLOYD: Please make yourselves at home.
LLOYD: Our boss will attend to your every need.
Cyril lightly kicked Lloyd in the back.
LLOYD: Oh, sorry. (clears throat) Our boss and us will attend to your every need.
BOYD: Here, have a seat.
The pigs pulled up chairs and set them out as if expecting somebody to sit down in them.
CYRIL: Comfortable? Good, good. Oh, by the way, would you care to try some of my salsa? It's my own secret recipe. Oh, me have some first? How thoughtful of you.
Cyril dipped a chip in the salsa and tried it. Suddenly, alarms started going off as the salsa burned his mouth.
CYRIL: AAAAGH!!!! IT'S HOT!! IT'S HOT!!!! WATER!!!!! WHERE'S WATER?!!!!!!!
BOYD: (holding up the bottle of wine) Here, boss, drink this!
Cyril snatched the bottle and opened it, and drank out of the bottle, cooling himself down.
CYRIL: (wiping his brow) Whew! (looks at label) Wow, 1975. Musta been a good year. (chuckles)
FLOYD: I think you added a little too much jalapeno, Boss.
CYRIL: Well, never mind that. We've got bigger fish to fry! Let's get outta here so we can keep practicing!
Cyril and the Pigs left the room, leaving Cedric, Sophia, and Xavier on their own.
CEDRIC: I don't think Senor De La Puma is gonna like Pop's salsa.
SOPHIA: But why do you think Senor De La Puma has to come check out the Sneer Mansion? What's that got to do with Cyirl joining his elite?
CEDRIC: Maybe Senor De La Puma wants to see if he can hold his meetings here.
SOPHIA: Yeah, maybe.
Xavier began babbling loudly.
SOPHIA: (calming Xavier down) Oh, no, no, precious. We won't let you fail your granddaddy. We're gonna give you a good bath.
Xavier gurgled happily.
All the kids were playing outside during recess. Bentley, Penny, Bonneville, Lindsay, Eustace, and some other kids were forming teams for basketball.
BONNEVILLE: I'm definitely taking Lindsay.
BENTLEY: I'm taking Penny.
PENNY: And that leaves just Eustace.
LINDSAY: C'mon, Eustace, wanna join us?
BONNEVILLE: (teasingly) We could show you how to play like the REAL men do! (chuckles)
Eustace giggled nervously.
BENTLEY: What about us, Eustace?
PENNY: Yeah, we could just have fun!
EUSTACE: Well, uh...
Just then, Charlie Possum stepped up.
CHARLIE: (to Eustace) Well, if it isn't little mister stinkytail!
BONNEVILLE: Charlie, what are you doing here?
LINDSAY: I hope you're not here to stir up trouble, 'cause we've been through enough trouble with that whole "separation of the sexes" thing you started last time!
CHARLIE: Chill out. I can see you guys wanna play a little basketball.
BONNEVILLE: Yeah, so what's it to ya?
CHARLIE: (referring to Eustace) Well, do you really want that little stinker on the court?
CHARLIE: I've been watching him! You guys don't wanna take him! He'll stink up the whole game!
Eustace began to feel bad.
LINDSAY: Don't be stupid, Charlie! He only sprays his stink when he gets scared!
CHARLIE: Just as well. I bet he can't even catch the ball when it comes right at him!
Charlie picked up the ball and threw it too fast towards Eustace, knocking him (Eustace) down.
CHARLIE: Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Eustace almost started crying.
PENNY: Look what you've done!
BENTLEY: How would you like it if somebody did that to you just because you're different?!
CHARLIE: What about Eustace? He's different because he doesn't THINK like a regular kid!
CHARLIE: So, what with his total obsession with pretty girls, his being a total chicken, his mental facilities, how can y'all live with that?
BENTLEY: He's our friend! We've learned to accept him for who he is, unlike some certain bully that we know.
CHARLIE: (sneers) Who are you calling a bully?
BENTLEY: You, you bully!
PENNY: Guys, cut it out! (glares at Charlie) You should be ashamed of yourself for hitting Eustace! Maybe that's why nobody wants you on their team!
CHARLIE: Fine! I'm better off not joining the team than being forced to work alongside the smelly peabrain!
Charlie stormed off, while the other kids gathered round Eustace.
LINDSAY: You alright, Eustace?
EUSTACE: I'm fine, but I don't think I wanna play anymore.
BENTLEY: Eustace, don't listen to Charlie.
PENNY: He just doesn't understand you the way we do.
EUSTACE: No, really, I don't wanna start any trouble!
BONNEVILLE: Eustace, it's alright. Charlie isn't playing. Besides, I know you could scare him away with your stink!
BONNEVILLE: Oh, sorry!
LINDSAY: That's alright, Bonneville. (to Eustace) C'mon, kid, we'll play and everything will be alright.
EUSTACE: No thank you!
Eustace ran off, leaving the other kids surprised.
PENNY: Charlie must have gotten to him pretty hard already.
Cyril had gathered Bert, Lisa, Ralph, Melissa, George, Nicole, Cedric, Sophia, and Xavier over. They were all dressed up in fancy attire.
BERT: I still don't get why you called us here, Cyril.
LISA: And why do we have to look all fancy and everything again?
CYRIL: I keep telling you guys, Senor Cougar De La Puma expects to see plenty of cleanliness and goings-on around here. It's all we need to get into his club.
RALPH: His club?
LISA: But, Cyril, don't you remember the last time you tried to get into a club?
CEDRIC: Yeah, Pop, it almost cost me and Bert our old clubhouse.
CYRIL: Trust me, Cedric, there will be no demolition or anything just as bad involved. I guarantee that this entry has absolutely no strings attached.
MELISSA: I don't know...
Just then, the Pigs came running up.
FLOYD: Boss, he's here! He's here!
LLOYD: Senor De La Puma is here!
BOYD: And not a minute too soon!
CYRIL: What?! Already?!
LLOYD: 'Fraid so, boss.
CYRIL: (to everybody else) Alright, folks, remember what you have to do! Make it look like there's something interesting going on here.
BERT: (sigh) We got it.
Everybody, except for Cyril and the Pigs, scattered around to do things, while Cyril and the Pigs walked out the front door where a fancy white limo was waiting. A dog in a tuxedo stepped out of the front and walked over to open the passenger's door. A cougar in a fancy Spanish outfit stepped out and approached the steps. This was Senor Cougar De La Puma.
COUGAR: (to the dog chauffer) Gracias, senor.
The dog chauffer nodded and went back inside the limo and drove off.
CYRIL: (coming down the steps) Ah, Senor Cougar De La Puma I presume?
COUGAR: Correct, senor. And you are Cyril Sneer, si?
CYRIL: Ah, si, I am. Welcome to...
Cyril accidentally tripped and fell down the steps. He grinned sheepishly and immediately got back up.
CYRIL: Sorry about that. (chuckles) Anyhow, welcome to El Sneer Mansion, the richest sight in the Evergreen Forest.
COUGAR: Ah, si. It looks even more beautiful than in the pictures.
CYRIL: It does, doesn't it? Now, uh, let us show you around, shall we?
Cyril and the Pigs led Cougar in. Cougar marveled at the insides.
COUGAR: Ah, a magnifico interior. (inhales) El divino!
CYRIL: You like it, Cougar, old boy? I just gave it a good dose of spit and polish this morning. (chuckles)
COUGAR: I can just imagine.
CYRIL: Now, uh, first off, I'd like you to meet my servants: Floyd, Lloyd, and Boyd. They shall attend to your every will.
FLOYD: (to Cougar) We are ready to serve you whenever you wish, sir.
COUGAR: My dear cerdos, I'd like it very much if you addressed me as Senor De La Puma.
LLOYD: Whatever you say, Senor De La Puma.
COUGAR: (pleased) That's better.
BOYD: Heh heh, thanks.
CYRIL: Now if you'll come with us, we'll introduce you to our, um... associates. (chuckles)
Cyril, Cougar, and the Pigs walked up to Bert and Lisa who were sipping on glasses of punch.
CYRIL: This is Bert and Lisa Raccoon. Handsome couple, aren't they?
COUGAR: Delighted to meet you two.
LISA: It's, uh, nice to meet you, too, Senor De La Puma.
BERT: Yeah, uh, glad you could make it. Say, would you mind if I made you a special peanut butter burrito?
COUGAR: I think not. Peanut butter does not at all appeal to me.
CYRIL: Oh, you know Bert. He's such a kidder. (chuckle)
COUGAR: (dryly) Really?
CYRIL: Oh, yes, really really. (leads Cougar and the Pigs over to Ralph and Melissa) And this is Ralph and Melissa. Jolly good friends.
RALPH: Welcome to the Evergreen Forest, Senor Puma.
COUGAR: Por favor, senor, call me Senor De La Puma.
MELISSA: Hello, Senor De La Puma.
COUGAR: Hola, senorita.
Ralph and Melissa exchanged uncomfortable looks. Cyril, Cougar, and the Pigs went into the study where Cedric and Sophia were playing chess while Xavier sat on Sophia's lap, and George and Nicole were both sipping on glasses of champagne.
CYRIL: And here we have George and Nicole, and my son Cedric and his wife Sophia. And there's my grandson, Xavier. Isn't he the handsomest little thing you ever saw? (chuckles)
Cyril patted Xavier's head, making him giggle.
COUGAR: Oh, please.
CEDRIC: Welcome, Senor De La Puma.
GEORGE: Uh, yes, welcome, Senor De La Puma.
NICOLE: Pleazed to meet you.
COUGAR: Nicole, I didn't know you were French.
NICOLE: I am French Canadian.
COUGAR: Ah, I see.
SOPHIA: Well, are you enjoying yourself, senor?
CEDRIC: What do you mean "hardly"?
COUGAR: I mean, so far, this little so-called "tour" has been muy tedious. (to Cyril) Don't you think you should provide some entertainment?
CYRIL: Oh, certainly, senor. I've been saving that for last.
COUGAR: (pleased) Ah, bazo.
CYRIL: Pigs, would you do the honors?
PIGS: (in unison; saluting) Certainly, sir!
The pigs ran out and Cyril and Cougar walked out themselves. The Pigs brought in the jukebox.
CYRIL: Well, Cougar, old boy, how does "Loco In Acapulco" sound to you?
COUGAR: I don't believe I know that one.
CYRIL: Well, you will in a minute.
Cyril winked at the pigs, who put a coin into the slot. The Four Tops' "Loco In Acapulco" began playing.
CYRIL: Everybody, let's party!
Everybody began to dance to the music. After the song ended, everybody felt exhausted, except for Cyril and Cougar.
COUGAR: (applauding) Ah, very amusing indeed. How clever to rally up our own guests to entertain themselves.
CYRIL: (wiping his brow) Ah, yes, it is quite clever. So, um, what did you think of that song, senor?
COUGAR: Muy loco indeed. Certainly inferior.
CYRIL: (surprised) Oh, uh, yes, it was. But, uh, how do you like the jukebox? Does it satisfy your tastes?
COUGAR: Of course not. Nobody at my elite would be caught dead operating such a piece of junk. I mean, one isn't a teenager after all.
CYRIL: Oh, of course not. But are you sure you're not having second thoughts about my mansion, hmm?
COUGAR: Well, come to think of it, it is becoming a rather sad little joke.
BERT: (to Cougar) For your information, senor, Cyril happens to be proud of this "sad little joke"!
Cyril let out a hearty chuckle.
CYRIL: Oh, that Bert! Always the king of comedy! To be totally honest, though, I've just thought of turning this mansion into my very own subsidiary of your international elite. How does that sound to you?
COUGAR: (showing some interest) Hmm, how interesting. We might discuss that sometime.
CYRIL: Works for me! What's say we go upstairs and talk this over, huh?
Cyril, Cougar, and the Pigs headed upstairs, while everybody else exchanged uncomfortable looks.
RALPH: I really don't like where this is going.
MELISSA: Neither do I.
Bentley, Penny, and Eustace were in the hallway headed toward their lockers.
BENTLEY: It's too bad you missed out on a great basketball game, Eustace.
PENNY: Yeah, you would have had plenty of fun.
EUSTACE: I just didn't wanna cause any trouble, alright?
PENNY: Eustace, you can't let what Charlie Possum said get to you.
EUSTACE: I know, but...
Eustace stopped when he noticed his locker was standing open with a note attached to the back of the door.
EUSTACE: Hey, how'd my locker get open?
BENTLEY: I don't know.
PENNY: And there's a note.
Eustace snatched up the note and looked at it.
EUSTACE: Oh no!
BENTLEY: What's the matter?
EUSTACE: (reading the note) "You wanna fit in? Go join a school with your kind! Charlie Possum."
PENNY: Oh, that's it! He's going way too far this time!
Penny snatched the note, startling Eustace a bit. After he had gathered his belongings out of his locker, he shut the door and found the word "RETARD" written right on the front in big bold letters. This was all too much for Eustace now. He ran off crying loudly.
MISS PRIMROSE: (stepping out of her classroom) What just happened?
BENTLEY: Look what Charlie Possum wrote on Eustace's locker!
Miss Primrose got a good look at the word written on Eustace's locker.
MISS PRIMROSE: Outrageous!
PENNY: You know something, Bentley?
BENTLEY: What, Penny?
PENNY: This is exactly like "The Hunchback Of Notre Dame"!
BENTLEY: Oh no, you're right! Eustace has just become an object of humiliation, just like Quasimodo!
PENNY: This is terrible!
MISS PRIMROSE: I agree! Somebody should speak to that poor boy!
Cyril, Cougar, and the Pigs were coming back down the stairs to join the others.
COUGAR: Senor Sneer, I've been wondering if you're really worthy of joining Elite Internacional De Los Más Ricos Del Mundo. Oh, I don't mind that you work for a living; we're a lot more tolerant of that sort of thing than we used to be.
CYRIL: You don't say.
COUGAR: I do.
MELISSA: (walking up to Cougar) Believe me, things were quite different when a lot of us were very young, senor.
COUGAR: (to Melissa) You seem to know your history, senora. I suppose you'd be willing to share some entertaining stories about you and your acquaintances here in the Evergreen Forest?
RALPH: You don't really wanna hear any stories about us, Senor De La Puma.
BERT: Yeah, don't you think you're getting a little personal?
COUGAR: I insist! I mean, after all, somebody here has to make my visit here more bearable. (to Cyril) I don't know about you, but I think your friends are becoming a little... uncooperative.
CYRIL: Oh, that's okay. They're just... joking. Yes, that's it. They're joking. In fact, this whole thing you see here one great big joke. A great, big... HORRIBLE joke!
Everybody else gasped, except for Cougar.
CYRIL: Yes, that's it! My own home is a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad joke! And if you don't like it, then don't blame me, because I don't like it, either!
Cougar hesitated for a minute, then put his arm around Cyril.
COUGAR: Senor Sneer, I must confess I've had my doubts about you.
CYRIL: Well, haven't we all!
COUGAR: But I think you're beginning to show promise. I think you may be worthy of joining my international elite.
Cyril grinned from ear to ear.
COUGAR: I shall depart back to Mexico immediately and discuss this with my colleagues. Then... I shall return!
CYRIL: Pigs, please show Senor De La Puma to the door.
FLOYD: You got it, boss!
The Pigs escorted Cougar over to the door. Then Cougar turned to face everybody.
COUGAR: Senors y senoritas, it's been delightful meeting all of you.
CYRIL: And we're all delighted as well. Adios!
As soon as Cougar was out the door, Cyril began acting like his regular self.
CYRIL: YES!!! WHOO-HOO!!!!! Oh, boy, is he something or what?!
BERT: Oh, yeah, he's something alright, and I think I know what that something is.
CYRIL: Yeah, class! Total class with a capital K! I tell you, though, I have to take some of the credit, 'cause I sure knew how to handle him! Ha ha!
CEDRIC: Pop, why would you ever wanna be like him? That Senor De La Puma is the most insulting, arrogant, prejudiced person I've ever seen!
Everybody else chattered in agreement.
CYRIL: Cedric, my boy, that's just his personality.
SOPHIA: Well, who does he think he is? He thinks he's better than everybody else!
CYRIL: Don't worry, my friends. You're all gonna get what you want!
LISA: Which is what?
CYRIL: To get into the International Elite Of The World's Wealthiest, of course! You see, I figured ahead of time that if I get in, I can get all of you in, too! Now you tell me: is that clever or is that clever?
RALPH: Cyril, I don't think you really understand what's going on here.
CYRIL: Ralph, do I look like the kind of guy who doesn't know what's going on here?
GEORGE: You just don't realize that none of us want anything to do with that bad news named Senor Cougar De La Puma!
NICOLE: And if you want to get in yourself, you see if we care!
CYRIL: Fine! I don't need any of you! Get out, all of you!
Everybody began to depart, grumbling as they went.
LLOYD: Boy, this doesn't look good.
FLOYD: You said it.
BOYD: (to Cyril) Don't you think you're being harsh on your own friends?
CYRIL: Harsh? Me?! No way! If they don't wanna get in, that's their problem! I wanna get into Senor De La Puma's club, and I'm gonna! Come on, porkers, we've got some business to take care of!
Cyril and the Pigs walked up the stairs.
NIGHT: EUSTACE'S HOUSE
Eustace's dad was standing at the base of the stairs, looking very upset. Eustace's mom came down the stairs, looking quite worried.
MR. SKUNK: How's Eustace?
MRS. SKUNK: He's still upset. He won't even come down for dinner.
MR. SKUNK: Is he still crying?
MRS. SKUNK: Everytime he stops, he starts all over again.
MR. SKUNK: Well, what are they teaching kids down at the school? How to pick on autistic kids?!
MRS. SKUNK: Calm down. It's not the school's fault.
MR. SKUNK: Well, I just feel so helpless! My own son has been hurt and I can't do a thing about it! I can't even tell him that it won't ever happen again!
MRS. SKUNK: You know, I really hoped we'd find our son a more inviting outlet once we moved out of Edmonton, but now I can see that it's just as bad as it was at Eustace's old school.
MR. SKUNK: Come on, honey. The whole world is full of people and kids who will do and say anything to put down anybody who's different.
Mrs. Skunk sat down on the sofa.
MRS. SKUNK: I'm up in Eustace's room, and he looks up at me with tears in his eyes and says "Why, mom? Why does this happen to me?" And I find myself saying the same things my mom told me when I was a little skunkette: "Some people are ignorant. They're afraid. They hate anybody and anything that's different." Then Eustace says to me "But WHY, mom?!"
Mr. Skunk joined his wife on the couch and they shared a sad embrace.
MUSIC SCENE: CURTIS KING, JR. AND LISA LOUGHEED: All Life Long
Eustace was lying down on his bed, crying. He began to think back to his days at his old school.
FLASHBACK 1: Eustace was walking down the hallway, when a student tripped him, making him fall on the floor. Everybody else laughed at him, making him feel bad.
FLASHBACK 2: In class, Eustace was staring at a pretty girl sitting next to him. Some students shot spitballs at him and taunting him for his interest in pretty girls. This made him feel embarrassed.
FLASHBACK 3: At lunchtime, Eustace was about to bite into his sandwich, when the same student who tripped him came along and snatched his sandwich out of his hand. Then he ran the sandwich into Eustace's face and laughed cruelly, making him cry.
FLASHBACK 4: At recess, Eustace was being tormented by bullies.
FLASHBACK 5: On the bus, Eustace was getting spitballs shot at him.
After the flashbacks ended, Eustace continued to cry bitterly into his pillow.
END OF MUSIC SCENE
THE NEXT DAY
Michelle Raccoon came walking up to the door and knocked on it. Mrs. Skunk answered it.
MRS. SKUNK: Michelle. We're so glad you're here.
MICHELLE: Thanks for calling me over. I'm so sorry about Eustace's predicament.
MR. SKUNK: (walking up) We know. It's never been this bad before.
MRS. SKUNK: And since we know you're autistic as well, we figured you might wanna help, too.
MICHELLE: It's the least I could do. Where's Eustace?
MRS. SKUNK: He's up in his room.
Michelle went inside and headed up the stairs.
Eustace was lying down on his bed, still looking miserable. There was a knock at his door.
EUSTACE: Come in.
Michelle came in.
MICHELLE: Hey, Eustace.
EUSTACE: (looking up) Oh, hey, Michelle. You look pretty today.
MICHELLE: Thank you. Mind if I sit down?
EUSTACE: Go ahead.
Michelle joined Eustace on his bed.
MICHELLE: Your parents called me about your problem and I understand exactly how you feel.
EUSTACE: (wiping his eyes) You do?
MICHELLE: Course I do. I have aspergers syndrome just like you, remember?
EUSTACE: (smiling a little) Oh, yeah, I remember.
MICHELLE: Look at it this way: having a different mindset might make you look odd to everyone else, but what they don't know is that with it you can do many amazing things, like drawing.
MICHELLE: Really really, and some people like me are able to make and edit amazing videos for everybody to see.
EUSTACE: That's amazing.
MICHELLE: Eeyup. There are so many possibilities as to what autism has to offer. Eustace, I understand you're having a hard time, but you gotta stand up for whatever you believe in or things won't ever change. And you know what?
MICHELLE: I can see a little hero growing right inside ya!
Michelle gave Eustace a playful noogie, making him giggle.
EUSTACE: Wow, thanks, Michelle.
MICHELLE: Don't mention it, Eustace.
EUSTACE: Can I give you a hug?
Eustace and Michelle shared a warm hug. Eustace's parents watched from outside his bedroom and smiled.
Inside, Bert, Lisa, Ralph, Melissa, George, Nicole, Cedric, Sophia, and Xavier had all reassembled. Bert was standing in front of everybody else.
BERT: Cyril says he doesn't need us, but we'll show him! We're his friends, and we're gonna show him the truth about Senor Cougar De La Puma!
CEDRIC: I love my pop, and I'm not gonna stand around and let him act like that braggard!
SOPHIA: Neither am I!
All of a sudden, the doors suddenly swung open, and Cougar stepped inside.
COUGAR: Oh, Senor Sneer!
MELISSA: He's here!
BERT: Sorry, Senior Cougar, but your pal's in another mansion!
Everybody else groaned.
BERT: What? Can't a guy make a decent Super Mario Bros. joke?
COUGAR: Now's not the time for fun and games. Where is he?
BERT: (nervously) Um...in the parlor room...somewhere?
COUGAR: (pause) If you say so.
Cougar began to make his way over to the parlour room, but Melissa stepped in his way.
MELISSA: Excuse me, Senor Cougar, but I think I shall give you what you really want.
COUGAR: And that is?
MELISSA: A story.
COUGAR: Ah, splendid. Let's hear it, hmm?
MELISSA: Alright. (clears throat) Once upon a time, there was a very rich man, and one day, this rich man heard about a special club which had so much appeal to him that he wanted to join it very badly. But what he didn't know was that the owner of this club was nothing but an arrogant, stuck-up braggard who showed nothing partiality and prejudice when it came to anyone who wanted to get in. The rich man's friends tried to help him but he pushed them all away, and all because he was unable to see the true colors of the person who ran this club.
COUGAR: Did this really happen?
MELISSA: You'd better believe it. In fact, it's happened very recently.
COUGAR: What do you mean?
MELISSA: Well, if you really want to know, I'm talking about our friend Cyril Sneer and how he wants to get into your club, but look at you! You swagger in here with your fancy clothes and your arrogant attitude and you expect us to kowtow to your every whim, let alone judge somebody here worthy enough to be in your elite! That's insensitive and insulting, and you know what the sad thing is? You don't have to be this way. You weren't born prejudiced; it's just something that you learned sometime ago, maybe even in your youth. And we feel deeply sorry for you because of all the wonderful people that you'll never get to know, because you think you're superior to everybody else! And if you don't want any of us in your club, then that's just fine, because we all have better things to do with our lives!
Everybody else chattered in agreement.
COUGAR: Well, I never!
RALPH: You know, Senor Cougar, there is a name for people like you: bigots. And when they come around here, they don't seem to stay that long, not in the Evergreen Forest, and they don't seem to come back.
Cougar didn't say a word. He just glared hard and was about to head out the door when Cyril and the Pigs came down the stairs.
CYRIL: Ah, Senor Cougar! I see you've been chatting with my friends!
COUGAR: Your friends?! Hah! They are clearly against the both of us!
CYRIL: Oh, don't you worry, Senor. They're all just nervous because they all want to join the club. (to his friends) Isn't that right, fellows?
Cyril's friends all looked angry.
CYRIL: Besides, I've already arranged it so that when I'm in, they're all in, too. Doesn't that sound good?
COUGAR: Start talking sense, senor! We are talking about Elite Internacional De Los Más Ricos Del Mundo! I wouldn't dream of letting any of your so-called "friends" in!
CYRIL: What do you mean?
COUGAR: They're just not our kind of people, and I do mean OUR kind of people, Senor Sneer, because now you're MY kind of people.
CYRIL: Well, yes, but...
COUGAR: I just don't see how you could have a bunch of idle middle class citizens as friends when my elite has plenty of aristocrats waiting for you.
This was the final straw for Cyril.
CYRIL: Idle? IDLE?! I'll have you know that these "idle" middle class citizens have supported me half my life, and I'd sooner throw away all my money than abandon my own friends! Say, what kinda elite are runnin' here anyhow if everybody's gotta be like you?! Doesn't sound like much fun to me!
COUGAR: My dear boy, fun has nothing to do with it. The purpose of Elite Internacional De Los Más Ricos Del Mundo is to provide a haven from the rest of the world. We are the dessert, and the rest of the world? Merely leftovers.
CYRIL: Oh, uh, speaking of which, would you care to partake in some of my homemade salsa? (to the Pigs) Pigs?
The Pigs ran off and returned with a tray with the chips and the salsa.
CYRIL: (to Cougar) It's my own secret recipe.
COUGAR: Ah, gracias. Don't mind if I do.
Cougar dipped a chip in the salsa and tried it. Suddenly, just as it happened to Cyril, alarms started going off as the salsa burned Cougar's mouth.
CYRIL: Hot, isn't it? Yes, I agree completely! Totally agree, yes, yes! Now listen here, pal! I don't know what kind of business you're running here, but I don't wanna be in your anti-social elite! I mean, if it's not good enough for my friends, then it's not good enough for me, either! (whistles) Bears!
Two bears came in and grabbed Cougar by the arms. They carried him to the door and threw him right out.
CYRIL: And stay out!
Everybody else cheered and ran up to Cyril.
LISA: That was awesome, Mr. Sneer!
BERT: Yeah, you sure showed him!
CYRIL: Hah, I did, didn't I? I tell ya, if his elite isn't good enough for y'all, it just isn't good enough for me, either!
CEDRIC: We're real proud of you, Pop!
Everybody gasped when they heard Xavier just say his first word!
CEDRIC: Did you all hear that?
SOPHIA: Xavier just said his first word!
NICOLE: Eet's a miracle!
RALPH: (to Melissa) Boy, I sure wish we were having kids right now, too!
MELISSA: Oh, me, too!
Ralph and Melissa kissed on the lips. Then everybody gathered around Cedric, Sophia, and Xavier, while Cyril grinned and scratched the back of his head.
Outside, while all the other kids were outside playing recess, Bentley and Penny were both sitting down on a bench and looking glum. Charlie walked up to them.
CHARLIE: What are you guys doing just sitting around? We've got some basketball to play!
BENTLEY: We don't feel like it.
PENNY: Yeah, ever since you tormented our friend Eustace, we don't even want to bother playing with you OR hanging out with you.
BENTLEY: Come to think of it, we've NEVER wanted to play or hang out with you!
PENNY: 'Cause you're nothing but a big bully who doesn't even care who or what gets in your way, and you're too inconsiderate!
CHARLIE: Fine. Then I don't even need you on the team, either!
BONNEVILLE: (from a distance) Hey, guys, look who's back!
Bentley, Penny, and Charlie all turned to see Bonneville and Lindsay escorting Eustace over to the basketball court.
EUSTACE: Hi, guys!
BENTLEY: (smiling) Eustace!
PENNY: (also smiling) You're looking happier now!
CHARLIE: (frowns) It's you again...
LINDSAY: Yeah, it's him again, and he just got back from a well-deserved comforting session!
BENTLEY: What happened, Eustace?
EUSTACE: Oh, uh, well, you see, Michelle came over to our house and, um... well...
CHARLIE: Well, what, punk?
EUSTACE: ...well... she told me that it's really okay to be different. Some people are scared because others make fun of them for the way they act, but not me! Nothing you can say can keep me from being proud of who I am, Charlie.
CHARLIE: Alright, then, if you're so brave now, then how about a little basketball?
BONNEVILLE: You're on, Charlie!
LINDSAY: And mark my words: you're gonna see that Eustace is more of a man than you could ever be!
EUSTACE: (confused) I am?
LINDSAY: (to Eustace) Just tryin' to give ya little confidence boost! (winks)
EUSTACE: (smiling) Oh, okay! (giggles)
CHARLIE: Bring it on!
All the kids were playing basketball. Bonneville bounced the ball and threw it over to Bentley. Bentley dribbled it and passed it over to Lindsay, who got blocked by Charlie. Luckily, Lindsay leaped and threw the ball over to Eustace. Eustace threw the ball up to the goal, it bounced off. The dribbling and passing and blocking went on, and Eustace kept missing the goal.
EUSTACE: I just gotta make it! But how?
LINDSAY: Hey, Eustace, I think I have an idea.
EUSTACE: What is it?
Lindsay whispered something into Eustace's ear.
EUSTACE: Good idea!
LINDSAY: Go get 'em, tiger!
The dribbling and passing and blocking kept going until Eustace caught the ball, and remembering Lindsay's suggestion, he jumped and used his tail to spring higher and perform a slam dunk.
All the other kids, except for Charlie, cheered for Eustace.
BENTLEY: You did it, Eustace!
PENNY: I didn't even know you could do that!
EUSTACE: Neither did I!
LINDSAY: Well, it was my idea!
BONNEVILLE: Wow! Lindsay, you're a genius!
Bonneville kissed Lindsay on the cheek, making her blush. Then all the kids lifted Eustace up and carried him in victory, the same way Lisa's friends did to her at the basketball game as seen in the flashbacks in "Moving In". Eustace giggled happily as the kids carried him.
INSIDE THE SCHOOL
All the students were parading the hallway while still carrying Eustace. Miss Primrose stepped out of her classroom to see the excitement.
MISS PRIMROSE: My, my! What's going on here?
PENNY: Miss Primrose! We won!
BENTLEY: We beat Charlie and his team at basketball! Of course, we wouldn't have done it without Eustace.
MISS PRIMROSE: Well!
BONNEVILLE: Yeah, and best of all, Eustace isn't chicken anymore!
LINDSAY: What he means is that Eustace has learned to be proud of who he is and not let what anybody says about his autism get him down!
MISS PRIMROSE: (to Eustace) I'm so proud of you, Eustace. Learning how to stand up for yourself can do wonders for you, even for your friends.
EUSTACE: (blushing) Aww...
Then Miss Primrose walked up to Charlie.
MISS PRIMROSE: As for you, Charlie, as punishment for what you did to Eustace, you are suspended from school for a whole week! And I will call your parents about this!
CHARLIE: Aw, man!
Charlie walked off sulking, while the other kids continued cheering. Several girls gathered around Eustace and kissed his face, leaving kiss marks all over. Eustace's face began to flush.
NARRATOR: So not only did Cyril Sneer learn a thing or two about knowing who his real friends are, but Eustace learned to be content with who he is and not let others put him down. This has been a truly special week here in the Evergreen Forest. Do you think it could get any better?
A FEW DAYS LATER: INSIDE THE CYRIL MANSION
Cyril Sneer was in his office, working at his desk. Just then, the Pigs came running in.
PIGS: (in unison) Hey, boss! Boss!
CYRIL: Oh, Pigs, what do you want? Can't you see I'm busy?
FLOYD: (holding up a package) This package came for you.
CYRIL: For me, huh? (taking the package) Let me see that.
Cyril tore open the package and took out a DVD.
CYRIL: Huh, I wonder what this could be?
Cyril inserted the disc into his computer and activated the DVD player program. An elegant-looking female cat dressed in a beautiful Mexican gown appeared on the screen.
FEMALE CAT: Senor Sneer? Hola. I am Senora Cougara De La Puma. I'd just like to say gracias for teaching my good-for-nothing husband a thing or two. Plus, thanks to you, lots of members of his social elite are quitting, including Scrooge McDuck himself!
CYRIL: (smiling) Wow!
COUGARA: Anyway, gracias again, mi amigo, for knocking some sense into Cougar. I just hope this will help him become a better husband for me. Adios!
The screen went blank.
CYRIL: Wow, I never knew I could make such a difference!
BOYD: Neither did we, boss!
CYRIL: Yeah! On the other hand... I wonder if I could arrange a meeting with Scrooge McDuck? Hmm...
THE FOUR TOPS: Loco In Alcapulco
CURTIS KING, JR. AND LISA LOUGHEED: All Life Long
LISA LOUGHEED: Run With Us